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eddiekim
read my profile sign my guestbook Name: Edward Country: United States State: Massachusetts Metro: Boston Birthday: 11/26/1987 Gender: Male Message: message me Website: visit my website Member Since: 2/15/2003

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Saturday, July 11, 2009

Here are the first two "mini-chapters" from an online blognovel I started over at http://eykim87.wordpress.com .

Disclaimer: Though the following contains content loosely based on actual events, it is to be read as fiction. Enjoy the read.

1. “When was the moment…”

by Edward Kim

Sometimes, having a conversation with someone in bed at four o’clock in the morning can be very interesting. When you’re lying there in the silent room with only the moonlight illuminating the pretty face next to you, the chitchat can go anywhere.

Tiffany and I spent the early evening watching old horror movies here at my apartment. Those 70’s and 80’s slasher films that once scared the shit out of me when I was a kid all seem so humorous now. I think it’s the mix of bad acting, outdated special effects, and the terrible writing that makes them so funny. Tiffany shares the same opinion so we thought it would be fun to rent a couple of them and make a night out of it. I got the movies, she brought the wine. It was fun.

I wouldn’t consider the relationship that she and I have as a romantic one. In my mind, she’s just another friend I have. Sure, I see her more often then any of my other lady friends, and we do things and act like as if we were a couple that was dating, but we’ve never actually made things official. To be honest, I actually don’t know what she thinks of our relationship. It may be the case where in her mind, she’s already come to the conclusion that we’re a couple because of the things we do, regardless of actually saying something about it.

At the end of a couple of movies and wine, we found ourselves with nothing much to do at a really late hour of the evening.

“So…you tired any Tiff?” I asked her. She repositioned herself on the couch and laid her head on my lap.

“I dunno, I guess…are you? Does mister Eric Daniels have something in mind?” she said in her playful voice. I can only guess that she had plans to stay the night again.

Have you ever heard anyone tell you that it’s impossible to be in the same bed with someone from the opposite sex and not do anything? The thought crossed my mind while I took a second to think of what to say to her.

“Do you wanna…go lay in bed for a little bit?” she asked me. I looked down into her eyes.

“…sure.”

Turns out that it’s pretty inevitable that something is going to happen if you’ve got someone else in bed with you. One small thing easily leads to bigger things.

After thoroughly enjoying each other, we laid there in silence for a couple of minuets.

“Hey Eric…can I ask you something?”

I turned to face her and starting running my hands through her soft blonde hair. She turned her head to face me and look me in the eyes. As she leans in to give me a kiss she asks…

“When was the moment you realized I was special to you?”

I was caught off guard a bit with that question; I really didn’t know what to say. It definitely answered my question about what she thinks of us though. What I say next could certainly change things. It’s easier to just go with the flow in bed than going with the flow with this kind of conversation. I had to think of a safe answer…

“uhhhh…you were always special to me…”

Responding with an answer like that could’ve gotten me off the hook, or into a little hole. Either way, something interesting is going to happen.

2. “You were always special to me too…”

by Edward Kim

When you wake up to start your day at two in the afternoon, it can be really easy to say that the day has been wasted. Tiffany decided it was time for her to go. We slowly crawled out of bed and put our clothes on. Neither of us were saying much, but she would just give me a look with that pretty little smile of hers. I would just smile back.

We both walk to my apartment door and I open it for her to walk through. She leans in to give me a hug so I embrace her. She squeezes tightly; I can feel her heart beating like a racehorse against my chest. I don’t think the same could be said about mine…I’m very unsure at this point. She gives me a quick kiss and leaves. I just wave and say “seeya.”

Not even a minuet passes after closing the door and I hear a knock. I open the door to find my good friend James standing there. James is one of my best friends. We both started art college at the same time and met while we were moving into the building where we both live. He lives in the apartment right under me. After about two years of having classes together, drinking ungodly amounts of alcohol, and the occasional smoking of the wizard’s herb, I’ve found that he’s one of the closest friends I have.

So there he was just standing there with his arms crossed and a perplexed look on his face. I greet him…

“Hey man, how you doin?”

“So…Tiffany stayed over again, eh?” he asks. “No wonder I haven’t been able to get a hold of you all day. Looks like you were busy last night…” I motioned my hand to tell him to come in. I really wasn’t in the mood to immediately talk about the situation between Tiffany and me so I try to avoid it.

“Uhhh, you been trying to call me?” I asked. I walk over to my desk and picked up my cell phone, which had been switched to silent. “Five missed calls from you…and…” <the phone vibrates> “…huh, just got a text from Tiff…”

“Oh yeah?” James asks. “What she say?” I open up the text and began to read silently to myself…

Hey, just wanted to say I had a really great time last night.
Give me a call when you’ve got time off again.
Btw, you were always special to me too lol

I put my phone down and looked over at James.

“Yeah…looks like she had a good time last night,” I said. James let out a small chuckle as he shook his head looking down at the floor. I just shrugged.

“So you been trying to reach me? What’s up? Something goin down?” I asked.

“You know Dave, the guy who lives a couple doors down from you? Well, I bumped into him this morning when I went out for a run and he said that he’s throwin a little party tonight at his place. He says that you and I definitely need to be there.” I sat there on my bed and thought about if I wanted to go.

“Yeah, I guess that’ll be cool,” I said. “I kinda don’t know him that well though, you sure it’ll be cool?”

“Yeah man!” James replied, “Dave’s a cool guy. Plus, since we’re all neighbors, he said he’ll probably smoke us up later. You gotta bring your own booze though.” I got up and started walking towards my dresser to pick out clothes to wear. I need a shower…I smell like the stank.

“Alright dude, I guess I’m down,” I told him while grabbing my selection of clothes and a towel. “What time is this all goin down?” I asked.

James started walking towards the door to let himself out, I followed behind him.

“I think he mentioned something like around nine or something like that, I dunno. I’ll come up and grab you,” he said. We gave each other a handshake and he started walking out the door. Just as I was reaching to close the door he quickly whips around and asks…

“Oh yeah, so what’s going on between you and Tiffany? Maybe you should invite her out to the party.” I took a moment to think about and slowly looked up at him.

“Oh I dunno,” I said, “I don’t think I’ll be inviting her out…see you tonight man.” I closed the door. Looks like it’s not gonna be a wasted day afterall.

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Saturday, April 12, 2008

To Love Your Life…Maybe
Edward Kim

Chapter 1: An Introduction

    To love your life…what the hell does that mean? One can propose the thought “do I love my life?” Ask the question to yourself and see what kind of answer comes to mind. Go ahead…take a moment. I’ll even take some time to think about it myself. Done? Good. As soon as you think about your own life in terms of personal approval, what happens? I think people often forget to just sit there and think about this. Now that you’ve taken the time and thought about it let’s move on and see where I’m about to take you next.
    As a child growing up in the 90s, I watched an incredible amount of television. It intrigued me that all in the same day I could watch the cartoon buffooneries of the Animaniacs, the morphin-ominal Power Rangers, white trash fights on Jerry Springer, the amazing hilarity of The Simpsons, and the sensitive “solve people’s problems” talks on Oprah. The list can go on but that would be completely unnecessary.
    Going back to the Oprah thing, I came to a realization that as the increase in popularity of that show became apparent, there was an increase in a certain type of literature. These books are commonly known as “self-help” books. They promised to solve your internal struggles, turn your life around, and make you feel better about yourself. The topics of these books perplexed me since the only internal struggle I was dealing with at the time was the inconclusive end to the Animaniacs series.
    By this point, I think you know where I’m getting at with all of this. Yes, it’s true. You can say that this is my offering to the undying genre of “self-help” but let’s not take that thought too far. What I’m going to present in the next couple chapters is something that might possibly help the person who answered the question “do I love my life?” with something that isn’t particularly “yes.”
    Here is a basic idea to think about. A human being in its most simplistic individual state has the power to do anything…really, anything. The only problem is that a good 85% of people don’t know this. Why don’t these people know? People get caught up in the systematic nature of fitting into the cookie-cutter timetable of life. This gives new meaning to human being; a human being just another miniscule pebble in the sandbox of life. We just need to move from just human beings to human knowings; a human knowing that they have an inner power that they can use to pull themselves out of any turmoil. How can we do this?
    We’re all looking for simple answers and the honest truth is that simple answers are everywhere. You can take any big or complex problem and break it down to its simplest stages and tackle them with small steps. Think about what a big or complex problem really is? It’s just a bunch of small problems all packaged up. Think about that.
    Here are some truths; some of the things I’m going to offer on the table may not be particularly easy if you are lax in nature. Some of the ideas might be hard to get across and may take some time. This may or may not help you; hence the “…maybe” in the title.
    The only guarantee I can give you is the guarantee you give yourself.

Chapter 2: The Program

    With a chapter title like that it almost makes this sound official. Well, I guess you can say that this is an important topic. This chapter is going to cover a topic that will require you to jump right in headfirst and will require daily action. If this scares you, don’t worry about it. The Program is something that was developed originally as a 3-4 month ritual. For practical reasons, I’m going to present a shortened 3 week version that is just as effective. Sounds good, eh?
    Before you start you’re going to want to prepare by getting a couple of materials. First, you’re going to need something to write in daily. It could be a notebook, notepad, or even just a bunch of loose paper. Just make sure that it can be organized into one article so you don’t lose any of the papers. Second, you’re going to need a writing utensil. So grab that pencil, pen, marker, crayon, feather, or whatever of your choosing and lets begin. *One Disclaimer: DON’T use a document file on your computer to use in this exercise. Why, you ask? Just because.

Week 1:
    Every morning when you wake up, before doing anything, take out your prepared materials and write a list of five things that you like about yourself. Just start writing simple things in the start to get the ball rolling. This shouldn’t be a very hard task at all but if you feel stuck, write in the simplest of things to get the juices flowing. Here is a sample of how simple you can make it.

1.    I like that I can breathe
2.    I like that I know how to pwn n00bs
3.    I like that I can wear comfortable clothes and still look decent
4.    I like that I can type fast
5.    I like that I was able to finish this list

    See how easy it can get? You’re only going to write five things every morning for this first week. Now here’s the catch. You CANNOT repeat items on the list from day to day. This means that by the end of Week 1, you’re going to have 35 different things listed that you like about yourself. Here’s another thing, once you are finished with a list put it away and don’t look at it (I’ll explain later in the proper time to look a them).

Week 2:
    Repeat process of Week 1 but increase the list from five items to ten items. You cannot repeat items on the list from day to day but you are allowed to repeat items from Week 1 if you remember them. Remember: You can’t look back at lists you have already completed.

Week 3:
    Repeat process of Week 2 but increase the list from ten items to fifteen items. You cannot repeat items on the list from day to day but you are allowed to repeat items from Week 1 and Week 2 if you remember them. Remember: You can’t look back at lists you have already completed.

    You’re done! How does it feel? Are you ready for the rewarding part? At this point after completing the three weeks, take out all the lists that you have created and start to reflect. You have 210 items(with some repeats) that you like about yourself. Read through all the items on the list.
    Here are a couple things to think about. You completed a three-week task that made you think every morning; be proud. By personal power you wrote 210 items that you like about yourself. How does reading the lists make you feel? Take some time and really analyze some of the ones that really pop out at you. You did a great job and now get ready for the next step.

Chapter 3: Goals

    As I was growing up, the concept of setting goals was heavily indoctrinated to me. I’m sure this is the same in your case. This chapter is going to take the simple principles of setting goals and make them a routine that you can apply to daily living. We’re going to take a similar process from chapter 2 to execute the next step. You ready?
    We’re going to be writing lists again so you’ll need to same materials from the last chapter. This time, write a 10 item “to do” list. Start the list with very simple things that you know you can and will do. This will start to get you in the flow of things to write. After writing a couple of the easy ones start putting in things that could be new to you. I encourage that you put at least two items on the list that require you to do something you’ve never done before. If you’re getting scared about a certain item that comes to your head, that’s you brain telling you that it’s should be on that list. It’s only your emotions that are getting in the way of you actually putting it on there; so put it on there. While you’re writing, keep in mind that they should be small simple things. Here’s a sample of a pretty good list.

1.    Call Mom
2.    Get groceries
3.    Finish work
4.    Relax
5.    Buy a new CD
6.    See friends
7.    Go for a walk
8.    Laundry
9.    Try a new food
10.    Ask ____ out to lunch

    Now go and write you first list. You’re going to have two weeks to complete the items on your first list. It may take you less than the two weeks, maybe the entire two weeks, maybe more.
    If you finish the list early, then you are going to continue to make new lists. Every time you finish all 10 tasks on your list write a new set of ten. Here’s a rule, you can only repeat 3 items from list to list and you can repeat the as many times as you want. If you want to continue putting “Call Mom” on your lists, that’s perfectly fine. Also, you have to keep adding at least two items that will require you to do something you’ve never done before.
    If it takes you the full two weeks to finish the list, start another list and try to finish it quicker. On your next run, try to make it a point to finish the tasks in a week and half. Remember, in every list you have to add at least two items that will require you to try something new.
    If you couldn’t finish your tasks in the two-week time, it’s ok. Here are some things to consider. What are the leftovers on the list? Was it the two new things you were going to try for the first time? In most cases, it is. Go ahead and write a new list for the next two weeks and carry over the leftovers from the previous list. Also, you have to add two items to the list that will require you to do something you’ve never done before. Really try your best to complete the tasks in two weeks. There are only ten items. You can do it!
    Continue doing this for at least 4 lists. If you wish to continue, by all means, please continue; it becomes more and more beneficial. At the end of doing 4 lists, take some time and reflect. You’ve been accomplishing tasks at a weekly to bi-weekly rate. On top of that, you’ve been trying something new. Realize that you are using personal power to achieve these tasks. This should build a huge sense of self-confidence.

Chapter 4: The Wrap-Up

    I hope that what I’ve presented will help to some degree. If none of this has helped, I can only wish you luck in your future search for your simple answers. If you feel like that there should be more to this, you’re absolutely right. If I were to end everything here it would seem like I’m giving you the wave good-bye and good luck. There is a supplementary follow up to this called “Dessert For Your Mind.” It is to be read after you’ve completed the entire package and found it beneficial. But if you feel like you’ve gotten what you’ve wanted and no longer need further guidance, then you may bypass the supplement.
    Feel free to share this knowledge as I have shared with you. For free knowledge is the richest knowledge.

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Friday, January 18, 2008

	http://www.myspace.com/overlegend
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Thursday, August 30, 2007

Currently Listening
Scarsick
By Pain of Salvation
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Edward is sick of home control devices, sick of sickening home designers, sick of drugs and gold and strip poles, sick of homies, sick of poses.

Jeeze, I haven't wrote in this thing in a long time. Back in Massachusetts. Eagerly awaiting for school to start. Moving into new apartment in Boston on Saturday. That is all...

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Wednesday, June 06, 2007


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